PAIN IS GOOD

so i overdosed on grey's anatomy today. who cares? but i picked up something... pain is good.

so i'm not in total pain. painfully confused probably but it's not so bad. and i can't complain really. if i learn to wait it out... if i learn to be patient... it'll all fall into place and it'll all be good... eventually... EVENTAULLY.

so i guess i wasn't born patient. and yes, i am the type who doesn't really mind knowing the ending. i don't. i'd still enjoy the story as much.

and i appreciate transparency and i like brutal honesty. if only the future can afford to be brutally honest now and tell...

"no girl, you'll end up with this guy... not that guy that you like so much... it's gonna be THIS GUY. you'll like him too... you'll see."

i know, i know. i'm being a brat and i can't have this easy. cause its not supposed to be easy and there's supposed to be a certain amount of pain...

painfully waiting...
painfully wondering...
painfully anticipating...

and i think i'm too old be dancing to this tune and i'd rather sit already and have that drink at the bar that you get right after you dance the dance and just right before the boy goes home with the girl. but i guess the world and all else in it have agreed that i should continue to dance around and wait while my feet hurt...

so i dance...

painfully dancing to the tune of the waiting game...

but i heard them say it today... pain is good. pain reminds you that you are alive. pain is there for a reason. i hope the reason gives me a kiss soon... kiss the pain away...

Shobe

• Madeliene
• Mia
•  Madz 
• Chuchay

Like all the names she is called, Shobe is a person with complex personality. She can be sweet and nasty. Fragile and strong. Smart and naive. This girl is my "mini me". We are so much alike but we also differ in some ways. I am so proud of the person that she has become. Now that she is a professional, the family's nurse continue to surprise us with her compassion and ability to stay strong when faced with difficult situations. Even when she was a kid, she knew what she wanted. Among the three of us girls, she is always the one with a firm choice. Now she is at her own crossroad, I have faith in her that she will make the right choice. Fight sis! you can do it. 

State of Apathy

I see you under unflattering lenses.. I tried to see through you, beneath the incompetence and lies..the shadows of doubt and distrust. You never proved me wrong but somehow confirmed that you are who I thought you were from the start. Despite the second chances, you continued to be the selfish beast that drag people into the labyrinth of deceit. 

I abhor the things that you have done. 

I detest everything about you. 

I hate your guts. 

Today, is my independence day from you and your filthy schemes. 
I will stop hating and feel nothing about you...

GOOD RIDDANCE!

Cravings

Catanduanes, Batangas and Bacolod City...have one thing in common. They have a special place in my heart. Catanduanes is the place where I grew up. Batangas spelled vacation to me when I was young. My dad is from the land of the Batanguenos.Unlike the first 2 provinces, Bacolod does not have anything to do with my roots. It's just that I worked in this beautiful city for two years. I have made friends, lived the life of a hiligaynon and learned their dialect as well. I left Bacolod in May of 2005 and was not able to visit since then. 

It's almost 5 years. And within that time I still feel the connection I have with the place, the culture and the people. There are a lot of things I miss about this place. The cheap taxi rides around the metro... the seafood I get to eat everyday, the beautiful places outside the city that I get to visit, the company of my super "malambing" friends and of course the FOOD! I am craving for food from Bacolod.

Here are some that are on my "CRAVINGS" list:


[1] CALEA Pastries & Coffee

 If you have been to Bacolod you are more or less aware that Calea is the place to be if you want the best cakes and pastries in town. Most if not all high end citizens prefer Calea cakes over the commercially available cakes from Goldilocks and Red Ribbon. The chocolate cake is to die for! And oh, did I mention that the chocolate mousse makes me forget my name? whew!

                                          Cakes by Calea

                                           Chocolate Cake 

                                                            

                                         Triple Chocolate Mousse

[2] Pendy's 

       

I apologize but I couldn't find a better picture than this. Although Pendy's also boast of a wide array of pastries, I fell in love with their Napoleones. The best in town I can say.

                                           Napoleones 


[3] IMAY'S

With Imay's I get to enjoy my favorite Filipino food. Aside from the usual crispy pata, kare kare and inihaw na tilapia, I always come back for their famous pinakbet. Yummy!

Pinakbet

[4] 18th St. Palapala

To complete my cravings list, nothing can beat kinilaw na tanigue and scallops in butter and garlic! I can almost taste it as I check out the pics..

scallops with tons of garlic and butter

I have lived a quite comfortable life in Bacolod. Thanks to my former boss for the experience. The Business Inn has been my home for several months before I decided to look for my own spot one of the subdivisions within the city. 

My home away from home

I miss Bacolod and I will be back soon.

MASSKARA Festival 2010... here I come!

Thanks Tinx!

When it rains...it pours! INDEED. This month has brought a roller coaster ride of emotions. At one point, I am surrounded with negativity... frustrations and a lot of  bulls***t... I swear I want to vomit! But then again, God always provides balance. It also brought opportunities for me to reconnect and hang out with old and reliable friends. In my recent post, I shared about spending time with my TeleTech friends. This weekend, I went to Laguna with my APC family and got the opportunity to invite Tinkerbell. 

Tinkerbell or Tinx as I call him was my former manager. Whenever I get really depressed with work or caught up with my personal drama... he is always there to be my happy thought. It's almost a year since he left and I really missed his company. Our weekend get together was the perfect venue to just have a good time. I rarely drink alcohol but I guess I was just so happy to celebrate the friendship that I had a little too much to drink last Saturday. We sang our hearts out with songs about love, heartbreak, friendship...anything that we can find on the videoke song book provided by the resort. [i know I usually sing off key but duh? who cares?] We laughed till our eyes were filled with tears. It was so much fun I can't wait for the next time we can hang out. I wish he didn't have to leave last year... If I can only turn back time. *sigh..sobs*

Thank you for the friendship Tinx! 

me and my boss 

one fine day

I received a message from a high school classmate the other day and it said, "good friends must not always be together. It is the feeling of oneness when distant that proves a lasting friendship". TRUE. 

I am very lucky to have kept great friends despite different religious affiliations...contradicting political views and geographical locations. These differences made the friendship stronger. I say trust and mutual respect is the key. 

In my previous posts, I wrote about leaving TeleTech with a heavy heart. One of the many reasons that I miss my old company are the friends [family] I left behind. Thanks to Facebook and texting, we were able to keep in touch. It's not the same though. I miss hanging out with them... sharing crazy stories or just goofing around. Most of them have left TeleTech and it got harder to make our schedules meet. 

A little over a month ago, my Accenture friends and I planned a get together. Just to catch up on things and see how each of us have been in the past year. Marcky [now working for Startek], Mommy Rubs [24/7], Shaoi [24/7], Faye [Thompson], Tofer [Verizon] and Barbie [24/7] agreed to set the date on April 13th. I really felt excited to see them again. 

Today is April 13th. I just got home from our get together. Unfortunately, only Marcky and Mommy Rubs showed up. For some reason, the rest of the crew had more important things to attend to. Although it would be a lot more fun if they came, we decided to make the most out of the day. 

After my shift, I went straight to Makati to meet my friends @ Starbucks Greenbelt 3. I had my usual choco frappe and Mommy Rubs ordered Caramel Macchiato. We waited for Marck because he overslept! duh! After almost 45 minutes of wait time, he showed up. I was really happy to see both of them today. Miss them much. 

It was almost eleven thirty-ish, we decided to look for a place to eat. Our feet led us to Bubba Gump. We checked out the menu and felt that we are not up to too much shrimp. Sentro was also a good choice but we had our lunch there the last time we met. Marcky suggested we eat at Recipes by Cafe Metro. We devoured on the delicious food served. 


See pics below: 

Recipes by Cafe Metro at Greenbelt 3

crispy tilapia, gising gising & general's chicken

lechon kawali with kangkong

prawn tempura

seafood rice

I was so full. Good food + good company + great conversations = BURP! We did not even finish everything we ordered, the rest we had to take out. whew! We did not realize that the crew were waiting up on us since they are about to close. We got our check and headed to Starbucks [Glorietta 4]. We continued our great conversation over chocolate frappe mocha frappe and mango passion fruit frappe! 

It was a blast. It felt like we just saw each other yesterday. I was happy to know that Marcky is able to apply some of the things I shared with him on how I handle my team. Of course there were funny anecdotes of when we were still with TeleTech. How time flies...I am just glad I was able to keep the friendship and lucky to have such great friends!

an unkindness

How do you get over someone who was never really yours? 



A question I asked myself after reading my friend's post.  


I am not a big fan of pseudo relationships but I admit that I have had first hand experiences. A lot has been written and have been told about this kind of relationship. The sad truth is that there is you and me but not "us"...  you share fleeting moments... invest time and though it's just a pseudo relationship, the emotions are real. 


There is an unkindness lying in between a sudden rush of happiness and fear. Fear that everything will be over even before it has started.  


Everything is real except the relationship. How can we let ourselves be stuck in this emotional nightmare?  It is because we are vulnerable...defenseless against our own sensitivity. Pain is eminent but still we expose ourselves to it. 


there is an unkindness in pseudo-relationships but if this is the closest that one can get to the real thing.. who are we to judge? 


It is better than unrequited love. 


To my dear friend [you know who you are]... pseudo or not, what matters is that your feelings are real. 


Cheers to you! 

Stars + Steak + TBC + Starbucks = me likey!

I am not very experimental with the music I listen to... I kinda stick to the easy listening type. Mostly old favorites. When I was a lot younger I enjoyed the music[?] of GnR...Bon Jovi... Nirvana and the like. As I mature, I switched to different genres and now find it hard to listen to the music of artists I once appreciated. 

My playlist = BORING. I kinda liked it that way but a few additions will not hurt, would it? Anyway, my friends and I were on vacation leave last March 31st purposely to spend time away from work and just chill. Marya suggested that we check out one of her favorite band performing at the G Strip in Greenhills for the Sun Victory Party. Thinking that I have not been to Greenhills in years [yes..years!] She got my vote. 

We started our night with a scrumptious meal at Tender Bob's. We ordered the following: 

[1] Seafood Platter 
[2] Steak Platter 
[3] Beef Salpicao 
[4] garlic rice 


For our drinks.. 
ripe mango shake [mine!]
green mango shake [marya]
bottomless iced tea [korholyo]
bottomless lemonade [kulot]

... and of course they had beer. ☺

After dinner, we went to the strip to check out the victory party. The "party" was kinda off.. the crowd was close to nil. Some college bands gave their best shot keep the very few people to stay and watch their performances. The audience was awkwardly silent. While waiting for Marya's fave band, we decided to check out one of the restos in area and ordered beer. Soon it was Taken By Cars' turn.

At the onset of their performance, I thought their music was different. Their sound is distinct, plus Sarah's voice is hypnotic! It took just a little time to convince myself that I was literally Taken by Cars! It turned the rather boring party around and I ended up enjoying the set. I asked kulot to share a copy of their songs so I can include it in my playlist. 

The set was over and as always, we decided to cap the night with good conversation over our favorite frappes at Starbucks Metrowalk. It was a laid back.. yet uber fun night spent with friends. I can't wait for the next group date!

FYI. I have been listening to Taken By Cars songs the whole week and counting... 

kilig

1 adjective. It is a sudden feeling of joy. Maybe an anticipation of joy, or just being overwhelmed with your inexplicable emotions you are feeling right at that moment. This is how http://pinoyslang.com defined the word KILIG. 

I can't remember the last time I felt "kilig". It's a surreal feeling... funny to some point. I am amazed how a simple conversation made my day. I said to myself, "I am too old for this cheap thrills" but someone told me that age is just a number. Love [or the feeling of being in love] and the heart never grows old. It made me think and concurred.  

I am NOT in love. That's something definite at this time but I guess feelings like this will always have a room in anyone's heart. Kilig is not solely caused by romantic reasons... there are a lot more reasons to feel this way. Oh well... 

Someone made me feel this way... a person from my past. An old friend looking to have new beginnings. Let's see where this leads us. For now... I still feel so kilig! ♥♥♥

MASERATI REUNITED

2009 was a great year for Team MASERATI. Most of my oldies but goodies have transitioned to different teams... Business Systems, Fulfillment Coordination and ASEAN to be specific. In February of this year, another rep joined the Sales Analyst Team. In the same year, I have welcomed new reps as well... newbies but goodies I may say. 

As a supervisor, I do not take credit for everything that they have accomplished. I am just happy to have been part of their journey to achieve their well deserved promotions. It has been months since the last time I was able to spend time with all of them. A reunion team building was a brilliant idea to get people together and just have a good time. 

After a series of team meetings the date was set. Everything was taken cared of  we were just waiting for the big day. It was a celebration of people who did not only become a part of my team but my family. As a tradition, we had a lot of food..booze and whole lot of FUN! 

I am looking forward to the next team gathering... tentative date: 050110! 

                                                            

                         TEAM MASERATI ... then and now.

                                                   
                                         Batch 1.0

           (L-R: Cara, Egay, Raz, Art, Earl, Carla, Moi, DK, Bee)

                                  Batch 2.0

                               (L-R: Ron, Moi, Jhoel)

                                  Batch 3.0

                           (L-R: Vhyc, Moi, Mico, Gel)

                                  Batch 4.0 

                             (L-R: Momon, Moi, Jaja)

   To my other kids who did not make it to the reunion... 

                                               ..Archie

                                              ...Gracee

                                             ....Erwin 

                                            .....James 

                                           ......Gerald         

                                         ........Jeriza 

                                      .......... Josef 

                                     ............Sherie


                                   
                       WE MISSED YOU! 

drought

drought.. it's been another month and still I can't seem to find the inspiration to write. Oh well.. I'm not about to push myself and write nonsense..but then again, it's worth a try. 

Procrastination. Defined as the act of procrastinating; putting off or delaying or deferring an action to a later time. I am guilty of this offense. I have been procrastinating (sort of..) not only with writing my blogs but a couple of other "tasks". I feel bad really. It's not something that I am proud of but letting out the reason why I procrastinate might help. 

Have you ever been frustrated with things or people around you? I HAVE. 

I know it's not healthy to let my frustration get the better of me but hey I am just human. The first quarter of 2010 proved to me that really.. EL NINO is here. There seemed to be a shortage of inspiration. Ideas remained ideas and were never put to good use. Friendships suddenly turned bland and soon lost its once sweet taste. All forms of Betrayal.. Lies.. Deceit..like a holocaust ruined what was once a happy place. 

We work to pay for dues but we build relationships to live and not just merely exist. In over a year's time, I have built great friendships and lasting professional relationships. It is however sad that not everyone will end up as a friend. Worse, some would be just another person you see everyday. I am not being dramatic or exaggerated about this but these things matter.. it may be insignificant to others but not to me. 

My environment and emotional state plays a big role on how I go through my daily routine..err responsibilities..whatever you want to call it. Bottom line is.. it's a big chunk of how I live my life. I  do not blame anyone but myself for feeling frustrated and demotivated. I need to leave the negativity behind. 

Q2 of 2010 will be the start of my productivity. No more procrastination. It will end the drought. 

Hakunah Matata my friends!